Saturday, 24 June 2017

Manhood

Something not quite so serious in a world that's so topsy turvy and angry. An extended limerick.

Manhood

There was a man with a dangly so small
The size of two garden peas were his balls,
Now he really did fret
So he searched the Internet
For a machine to make his manhood stand tall.

The apparatus he laid on the table
The instructions said, to sit on something stable
He read, it won’t take too long
The suction is very strong
Soon you’ll be hung like a donkey and able.

His John Thomas he smothered in lube
From his balls hung the weight in the shape of a cube
When he fired up the pump
The poor bugger did jump
When his manhood disappeared down the tube.

Julian Clarke © 2017

25 comments:

  1. Better small than not at all! Well proportioned and lubed limerick.

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    1. I thought so, too. Pleased you enjoyed it.

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  2. Tough luck! Pea sized is still better than none. Wonderful humor, Julian!

    Hank

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    1. Thankyou, Hank, pleased you liked it.

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  3. LOL. I can think of one or two I'd like to try this machine. Hee hee.

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  4. Oh dear! He thought he was fretting before....he might be regretting the purchase of this apparatus!

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  5. This made me cross my legs... I will never trust the internet with these things.

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    1. Thin how he felt! Thankyou for your comment.

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  6. this made me giggle!
    great write.

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    1. Giggling is great and so pleased you liked it.

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  7. Well your mother warned you about going blind...The Devil makes work etc. LOL

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  8. I think I know this person.

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  9. I smiled and grimaced simultaneously at the end. Wonderfully fun read. I found myself giggling, too.

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    1. Thanks, Lorraine. I am pleased it amused you.

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  10. Made me laugh and so witty. Could hear your voice Julian as i read and laughed.

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    1. Thanks for stopping by, I hope its stopped raining for you. Glad you enjoyed it.

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  11. Julian? what the hell was all that shit getting here to comment? your piece stands alone. I even sang it.
    ZQ

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    1. Thanks, I don't know why it was difficult for you to comment, no one else has said anything. Anyhow thanks for dropping by and commenting, always appreciated

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  12. I am really impressed with your writing skills and also with thee layout on yopur weblog.
    Is this a paid theme or did you customize it yourself?
    Either way keep up the excellent quality writing, it iss
    rare to seee a great blog like this one today.

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    1. Thank you for your comments, I'm pleased you enjoyed my writing.

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